i want you now
you need to stop dating girls with the same name as your mother...or stop drinking so much...I don't want to see this
Me too. I'd like to spend all next summer high and drunk and riding ponies and boys.
Look I'm sorry I shaved your cat, but get over it.
I just watched a video of Justin Bieber kissing a girl..... the sad thing is that I actually got upset.
I just want a better ending for myself. Not walking around with one sock on and my bush hanging out.
Just saw a crackhead get taken down by pd in the canal. Its offically spring
I came so hard just now that I think I may have regenerated.
I told him if I was pregnant we were coming out to the people at work, because I'm not pretending to get knocked up by an imaginary boyfriend.
You ever fart so hard while you are asleep that you wake up screaming?
I just want you to know when I bang him in the back of my car later I'll have pony by ginuwine on repeat
I just started talking about how noodles were so good
I don't fucking know. He perched his parrot on his dick. I left after that.
Once again, your first date sounds like something of an epic. Odysseus' Quest for Fourth Base.
I am a unicorn in a field of flowers, you asshole.
Idk, I know when I drink vodka my bi side comes out and I just want to make out with a girl
Randomize
