in my opinion joe jonas is kinda pointless. hes just the pretty boy front runner.
Omg. Budweiser tramp-stamp sighting @ Wal-mart. Best tattoo EVAR.
I have all these new brothers and sisters I'm just now finding out about
I'm in the dining hall. that same guy is here again, the one who sits alone and talks to his silverware.
Skanksgiving break is awesome already... pilgrim and indian roleplay tonight.
He gave me a 420 gift that consisted of a dime bag, a philly cheesestake, and a Pepsi that was still cold. If he ever wants a free bj, I got him.
As your boss, I feel obligated to tell you that turning our management meeting into a kegger may just be the best idea you've given me yet.
we tried to pick out bridesmaid dresses with pockets so we could sneak flasks in with us. what the fuck is the point of a dry wedding?
I can neither confirm or deny any bear related allegations right at this time.
It took him an hour to realize I wasn't this "Sarah" girl, and by then he was already crying and eating pizza rolls.
I love being high. The owl outside stopped who-ing and I could swear I just heard someone say, "Okay, that's a wrap!"
Awkward drunk fist bump with the boss. Not sure if tomorrow will be weird or wonderful.
Reasons why I love cats more than people: 1. They're not fucking people.
My one night stand said I love you, opened my fridge, stole my cream cheese and left.
This strange Italian man told me he wants to take me for ice cream and kept calling me "tomato" from tinder
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