I'm laying in your front yard are you home
Is Jonathan Taylor Thomas a gay? I need you to google search it for me. Its important
just used a caramelizing gun to spark a bowl, i don't think today could get much better than this.
Not even desperate vagina wants small cock.
Glad to hear you raised your standards
sleeping in bed with your booty calls married sister...you're the stuff heroes are made of.
He SHOWED UP to the party wearing one shoe and a dinosaur hat. He kept lifting up his shirt and asking people to bite his nipple.
It's national boyfriend day supposedly, would it be appropriate if I posted a picture of my dildo?
Is she still in your room?
Not for long. My plan is to smoke her out like a small woodland creature.
I would rather get explosive diarrhea at the aquarium than go home alone tonight
I'm trying to seductively eat these M&M's to let her know its on
It's after midnight. I didn't find the answer to my problem, but I did find the bottom of a bottle of vodka, so... there's that.
Tent sex on an air mattress requires balance and flexibility. Not for the faint of heart
Great news. I WILL BE FUCKING IN A BOUNCY HOUSE TOMORROW.
It was a tough decision either lay in bed or go to work and lay in the stockroom
Dear sober self, your keys are on the table in front of you the only way your typing this is with autocorrect goodnight love you
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