he was like Britney Spears in bed.. a little chubby and too medicated to perform.
There's a girl n class drinking wine out of a taco bell cup. I can smell it.. it's totally reisling. JEALOUS.
He's a firefighter, who has his own band. I'm pregnant just thinking about him.
So... he formspringed me a link to every nude pic ive taken since he 8th grade. ive evolved nicely. but im nervous as to how this a website.
he told me he's been faithful to his girlfriend and is gonna try to stay that way. challenge accepted.
Well I'm 85-90% sure that he licked syrup off my body, but no guarantees...
I'm gonna go out on a limb and say it had something to do with pool sex.
It all boils down to, who else do we know that is willing to buy our friendship?
hey, you wanna get together over coffee or something?
is this code for 'i just got broke up with and i need a sympathy dicking'?
how did you know?
Just got high and apologized to my vagina for getting chlamydia
The only reason I have clothes in my overnight bag is to cover up my sex toys.
HE WAS SUPPOSED TO BE THE TROPHY HUSBAND! I WAS GOING TO BE THE SUCCESSFUL ONE!
I didn't want him to hear me sneaking in. The doggie door was the perfect solution.
Do you ever go take a shit and end up sitting on the toilet for like 45 minutes wondering what the fuck you're doing with your life?
Everyday my friend, everyday.
It was beautiful and filled the audience with hope for the future. :3 I wish I could speak more but sleep werk nighty
I asked how you were doing?
Randomize
