nothing can go wrong this weekend. $1500 to spend. i have options for hookups every night. my backup plans have backup plans
That weatherman I hooked up with is on TV again
Now there's vomit covered trash all over the front lawn. I feel accomplished
it was either that or behind a dumpster, and i am way too pretty to pee behind a dumpster
We don't have a ruler. Come downstairs and lay in the snow with a boner so we can see how much snow we've gotten. Put your 8 inches to a less shameful use.
For future reference, the blowjob coupons I gave you for your birthday are NOT transferable to pay your friends for tacos.
She wants to have naked weekends
They call that free range vagina in France
pain. pain everywhere. this is why throwing yourself at concrete is a bad idea.
You kept trying to get the girl i brought home to hook up with you by enticing her with 12 baconnators you brought home
You told the entire smokers deck that you were blowing .08 now and anyone else willing later
He called my boobs fluffy. Part sexy part pilsbury dough boy. Part sexy pilsbury dough boy. I'm so confused. And flattered?
ya I went to the grocery store literally just for cheese and condoms
It was get out of line and go pee and get no beef briskit. Or stay in line, pee my pants, but have beef briskit. I really wanted my beef briskit
She is beauty she is grace
she’s masturbsting in front of an open window while drunk af 9am
i thought you had class
You're like a care bear with a big cock & a sexual prowess that would put the mighty Thor to shame.
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