I can't believe you blew on her face.
I feel that every long term relationship needs at least one big,load delivered straight between the eyes.
I just called a child with a Yankees jersey a jerkoff. so much for a friendly day @ the ballpark
That adds atleast one bjs worth of awkward sexual tension between us.
Ask him about the girl he took home Saturday night. I swear she voted for Kennedy.
Is there a word for someone who only has sex with NFL prospects?
Just think. Tomorrow you'll wake up, shower, and get your brains fucked out. That's your ice cream. Today is your peas and carrots.
Like, I just want to be naked rolling around in soft things.
I pretty much landed into this relationship penis first
And if it ever comes down to tax or healthcare benefits we can get married
That's the sweetest thing I've ever heard
It's not even 6 am and I've already told my mom to fuck herself in the face
But I got head on a boat yesterday which was sweet until a bald eagle flew over. Then it became life affirming.
I know this is a weird question but we both had pants on when my mom woke us up last night right?
I'll explain later but I just had to legally commit to abstinence for the next 4 months
according to the calendar even that i put in my phone last night, i'm supposed to fuck shit up at 11am today... i really hope i didn't miss something important
i just cleaned my bong... I do not feel healthy
Randomize