No, I don't think Michelle is a squirter. And if I've had anal sex, the Obamas have.
just put cider in my bong. gotta love fall
there is a large number of people floating in the fountains the morning in inter-tubes...its only 930. did i miss something?
Hopefully. Play it cool. Bust out a few jokes. Chew with your mouth closed and show your boobs.
I just saw a van full of amish parents and their kids. Those cheating mother fuckers!
I blacked out after the shots of canned lobster bisque.
I can count the number of hours she's been sober this weekend on one hand.
They woke me up at 4 in the morning screaming "drunk adventure time!" because they needed a sober chaperone. They made me walk them around the block shoeless.
He picked me up went to throw me on his bed. I landed on the wood frame. That's how I broke my rib. We still fucked. Thanks tequila. Best injury ever
I have their Unicorn picture in my shirt, and I just threw a Bud Light Platinum bottle through their window. We need to go now.
Waking up to find your mom holding your birth control pills and telling you I suggest you take this
The straight guy here is hot. He described himself as Christian grey without the money and my vagina fell out of my body
Thursday is not a good day to become a felon... It's bingo night
THE AUSTRALIAN IS SINGLE AS FUCK.
I knew the bike rally would be fun when I saw "male pole dancing" on the schedule
Randomize
