if I could go back to kindergarten and not fuck up my life, I so would.
The sun is out and the snow is finally starting to melt here... Vodka bottles keep popping up everywhere. Guess it's the college version of burying nuts for the winter
Having sex with her is like doing taxes, Happens once a year and I usually end up paying.
Technically this isn't a church so we could have been drinking this whole time.
Just look for the house with the beer knights.
My goal for break? Fuck all my exes in reverse order.
The fact that I'm going to be living with you is starting to make me worry about my heatlh.
Ya that ship has sailed dude
he told me i could have the honorable privilege of being the second girl to have sex with him in his new apartment, what a gentleman.
She's on her way over to shave my year round sweater vest into a festive argyle sweater vest. Keeper?
Just took a piss in some random bushes in a traffic jam and had to sprint back to the car. I'm a boss.
dude I don't even care if I'm getting catfished the point is I'm going to get laid. hot bitch, fat bitch, skanky bitch, i don't care my penis is having an adventure tonight regardless
I can't feel the bottom half of my face but i feel like our sex would be amazing
There's glitter all over his bed from my Pink VS panties... I think I might invest in similar styles as a way of marking my territory just incase.
I have to lie to someone and move five gallons of fermenting alcohol across campus but after that i'll hit you up 4 sho
Idk I just think that seeing that man's Twitter always resulting in me looking for the whiskey is a bad sign
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