why do they call them blowjobs? ....unless i'm doing it wrong?
he is fucking friends with his exwife on facebook, but he defriends me after 3 dates? am i that crazy?
two fat guys on crotch rockets just invited me to 'party' with them at a del taco. why does this keep happening to me?
All I know is that it's pretty damn mean to put a glass wall in a bar.
She gave me head because I gave her my pack of cigarettes...And you said quitting would be hard.
The beers last night were like the tears from god
Ive seen teh same guy pissing in the corner. Twice. Its eally weird. My frieds gonna do th funnel. Im so excited for her! Love, cori. Cuz its lik a diary.
One of my coworkers just invited me to a wet t-shirt contest this weekend in honor of her son's 21st Birthday.
Also I'm very proud of th fact that I walked my dog before bed. Drunk dog walking should be an Olympic sport; it takes SKILLS.
Double vision is so hot when a big dick is in sight. Thank you Bud Light.
Like we were literally doing coke off his insulin pump
I just had a twenty minute discussion about endangered breed dog breeding with an Extremely drunk guy
So many questions...
My neighbor was my D.A.R.E officer and I feel like I've defeated him by smoking weed outside everyday
Im not as flexible as I once was, but I still managed to get eaten out in the front seat of a hummer behind keddies.
I just recommended that the library purchase the first major hentai with tentacle porn. Really, I'm doing everyone a favor.
Randomize
