so, my congressman just called me to say he has office hours this week if i'm still interested in talking to him. i pray to god this is not related to Friday.
the guy that filmed erin andrews naked got 27 months in jail. Every man that's seen it should send him cigs and a nail file baked in a cake. We owe it to him.
Never again will we have slut saturday. Never.
I am trying to think of a way to make alcohol cupcakes
From the prices on this menu it looks like I have no choice. I have to blow him.
I am getting drunk. And i'm going to paint my face and slide down the stairs like Pochahontas. Goodbye
So. Do you think marshmallow vodka in hot chocolate while eating a graham cracker would = s'mores?
In some strange universe, yes
I know. But whatever I'll just eat cold pizza and play with my cats by candlelight
I mean. I'm excited for the Seahawks too. I just love nachos.
In another note. Thanks for making me get a vibrator. For real.
TFW YOU ACCIDENTALLY SEND A MEME ABOUT LIKING ANAL TO THE GROUP CHAT. JESUS FUCKING CHRIST, WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME?
I hate him but I love him for what he does which is me
Being an adult is fun. You can experience a break up, then go fuck someone else in the woods.
fyi: first time in five days i havent washed my birth control down with liquor. when are we going out tonight?
he had a cock ring. i orgasmed before he even put it in
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