So you're telling me it's impossible to have a "slight case" of chlamydia?
You don't understand, Single Ladies is like the Don't Stop Believing of the gay community.
i realized that the internet ruins the joy of a father passing down playboys to his son
Vibrator and massage oils got stopped at security. Super.
the guy next to me needed a pen, so I let him take one from my book bag. my panties are now being passed around the class...thank you for telling me you hid them in my bookbag.
My brain is officially off for summer until late august. If that guy wants to fuck me, he better do it soon.
why does the wii remote smell like your vag?
Like if Robert Downey Jr. and Kiefer Sutherland got together for a bender, that's how drunk I want us to be.
This exeeds the amount of high I planned on being.
Would it be weird if I told you I thought of you when I masturbated?
Looks like I'm more than just your Mexico mistake...
Nothing like playing hide and seek with a state patrol officer early in the morning to get your heart rate up.
Are you two whores ready for me to turn the light on so you can see what you came home with last night?
Ultimate fat girl moment: I promised him my mouth for the night if he bought me a funnel cake..
She said her name is "Goose" and regardless of her being a lesbian, sometimes she just "needs a good dick"
yeah i ran into him at the bar at 11pm. he started talking about engineering and the next thing i know it's 4am and i'm naked on top of him.
Randomize
