Do you remember getting into a Delorean last night?
Did you fuck her?
If by "fuck her" you mean "threw up on her shoes," then yes, I achieved that.
Just passed a sign for an "adult food and fuel superstore". Wtf does that even mean?
im not sure but a few things come to mind which just makes me giggle
Guys should not giggle. Ever.
Most awkward thing ever: Meeting your BattleShits opponent post war.
new low, shannon just screamed FUCK THE IRISH to a 10 year old's face then proceeded to throw a hotdog at his parents. I think its time i take her home.
I got a chicken sandwich and a frosty out of her. Better then having sex
I Apparently saved a picture of the Eiffel tower in between 2 pics of his dick. It appears to be the same size. I fucking love Paris.
I woke up with a black eye, bruised knuckles, wearing women's clothing, in a house I did not recognize, next to a solid 9. Thank you for making 21 special.
I'm sure we could go all project runway on our diapers and create some flattering absorbent thongs. We could do it on the Boat. Call it project rumway.
I had to sit there with his three fat aunts talking about a bunch of 50 Shades knockoff books.
I felt like a taxi, but my meter was running up minutes he would be eating me out that night.
I have vodka and explosives. For once, we can blow something up that isn't a blow-up doll.
There's always a silver lining when massive voluptuous tits are involved
We drove through Taco-Bell on our way to the ER
My friends said as soon as you walked in, I motor boated you like there was no tomorrow.
Yeah, I liked it.
Only good thing about being an essential worker is that I have a letter allowing me to cross the bridge into jersey to get booze
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