all I remember was being half naked drinking water on my hands and knees from her dogs water bowl.
i mean i'm ok with bufu but if i'm gonna do it it needs to be a mutual agreement, and there are steps that need to be taken. you don't just go OOPS we're doing it now
At one point during the moaning he reminded me of Forrest Gump
I like daylight savings. I don't care if it's 4 oclock it's not daydrinking if it's dark out
seek help.
She literally crushed my balls between her butt cheeks. It was both the greatest and worst thing ever. Dancers are awesome.
If I take diet pills with my edibles I'll be a perfect person
donating our bodies to science does not justify what were doing to them.
I also just told a guy I was available for counseling in case he needed to 'bang' things out. I've become a monster.
Because Kyle had a tattoo kit at his house and I wanted one and all he could draw was a mustache or a stickman on fire
It's not so much that I'm giving her money because I threw up on her floor. It's more like I'm paying her to never ever mention it again.
Ok so I didn't mean for his first impression of me to be lying face down on his roommates bedrooms floor throwing up my jäger but it happened. Atleast my ass looked good in those jeans. Think I still have a shot?
he had a Pillsbury dough boy tattoo to remind him of his drug dealing days
You also once spent an entire hour explaining the origin of the strip steak to me.
New rule. If he's too busy to put the "H" in "what" then I'm too busy to put his D in me.
His pet bird was perched ON HIS DICK.
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