i have a strong urge to join the asians in the park doing tai chi. I think im still high .
If he looks like a Gremlin DO NOT get him wet.
47 days without vaginal penetration. Im pretty sure it's grown over.
Do you realize that if your cunt was a missing person it would be assumed dead?
the guy that filmed erin andrews naked got 27 months in jail. Every man that's seen it should send him cigs and a nail file baked in a cake. We owe it to him.
If we went to a costume party as Batman and Robin I would go as Robin, that's how much you mean to me
Dont even bother asking why she was dancing with him on top of a door, let alone how the door ended up being used as a table.
New carpet is nice. I'm making carpet angels. Like a fresh snowfall.
I DON'T EVEN KNOW ONE MINUTE IM SITTING HER THE NEXT IM FLYING PASSED THE MOON
PISSING MYSELF IN ZERO GRAVITY
THOSE AIN'T STARS U SEE TONIGHT GURL
She loves introducing her friends to my foreskin.
The album on my phone containing gross pictures to send when boys ask for nudes is now substantially larger than my normal photo album. Because I send one every night
She looks like a hot George Washington...I'm going for it
Well I shit myself on the way home from work today so there's that...
Let's ride this possibly pregnant train together
So our night ended with 6 cruisers, a fire truck, and an ambulance. Also, lots of blood. How was yours?
Having sex with him is like yoga. I do it in the morning and then can't walk for three days afterwards.
Randomize
