ya and he came three minutes into it because he didnt have sex all summer
oh that makes more sense i knew you arent that good
When you want to head down the cleveland on Sunday?
What time do the bars open? I dont want to remember how bad theyre gonna lose
She put her phone in her underwear and it somehow managed to work it's way into her vagina. she has a BLACKBERRY.
Hey since its national brother week is that eiffel tower option with your girlfriend still on the table?
when the song champagne showers came on you poured some kids beer over his head... while giving him a lap dance
Someone posted a printout of my tits on my door this morning! Where did they get this photo!?!
I just had sex over my oven then high fived the guy. It's going to be a good year.
In sex ed. they really need to include a lesson on saying tampon in foreign languages, just in case.... Trying to ask the woman at the reception desk, who barely speaks English, for one just turned into an awkward game of charades.
No. If I hated you would get none. Then I would eat them all in front of you and laugh at your tears. Although that hasn't been ruled out for entertainment purposes. Nothing purposeful.
i think the sex is so good because i get a contact high just from fucking him
He's in grad school at Harvard. I suppose that means my vagina is now smarter than I am.
When ur uncle gives you free weed, you take it
That's crazy. Wow that lady must be fucked up
Yeah I hope she's okay.
I'm still going to fuck her husband but I do hope she's okay.
COME TO THE TOP OF THE MOUNTAIN AND I WILL GIVE YOU MY SAGE ADVICE.
Maybe those shots of hot dog water wasn’t a good idea after killing a fifth of tequila.. but who’s askin
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