you want me
i'd rather choke on a dick.
I will also inform you that stairs change when you change a house. Those hurt.
One reason I don't come to Portland. I saw 8 guys I have had sex with last night. At the same party.
By 8 I mean 9.
And by 9 I mean 10.
Have you been tested recently?
Well I got my shots when I was a baby so I think I'm immune
someone was throwing condoms at us.
no, they just magically show up around you.
I don't care. I'm going to fuck John's friend and it's all your fault.
I have never made a good decision in that bathroom...
what is it with giant penises always finding me
Hne relally is a cite oerfect gome. Nes awddddddddooooome.
Do you have any idea how hard it is to concentrate on legal issues with the ghost of his giant penis in me?
Aaaaaaaand dick pic. God bless america, and god bless tinder.
Pssh I just bang a girl in a single person tent. Thats like the back seat of a sedan.
I woke up with broken tostitos all over my bed and a snap chat of myself flipping off the camera.
Hey, thanks for not calling the cops when I answered the door naked, high as fuck, and covered in red velvet cake batter.
Maybe if I ever do become a counselor, I would just implement a kind of intensive meme therapy.
Randomize
