I told him he can't put it there till we're exclusive. That's totally The Relationship Hole.
Just cropdusted the office
drunk enough to think that masterbating in the pool is an awesome idea
I've broken several federal laws in the name of sex.
When you put it that way it sounds like my vagina is a parking garage to be monitored by security guards
Pretty sure I just convinced a drunk guy at the train station that I was from the future
Hey hey, in my defense we were just suppose to watch Disney movies from a blanket fort with beer and nachos. I was I suppose to know it would end in tears?
I want everyone to love me, and THEN I will choose who gets to eat me out all the time.
His hands kept asking for sex, but all I could think was "dude, this is going to ruin my high".
I'm still high with raccoon eyeliner eyes and chocolate all over my face and chest, clutching a mug of wine. Happy graduation.
Suspicion confirmed. my mom has her nipples pierced
Way to crack the case Nancy Drew
I can't help but look at my sex life and acknowledge that this is not normal behavior.
I had a really bad dream about us drinking this weekend. Remind me to tell you Friday when we start drinking
He fell asleep cradling my ass and every time I moved he adjusted his hand accordingly. I've found the one.
Well when you come back we can have a huge bitch fit...or get really drunk....whichever comes first
Randomize
