Glitter + Penis = Best. Idea. Ever.
i wouldn't be half as slutty if there were better things to do.
Is it proper Ass-Fingering-Etiquette to tell her u felt her poop or just pretend it didn't happen?
He's pole dancing on a heat lamp.
Yeah I hope so. Definately just saw two freshmen in very authentic togas and cotton ball beards. This new class is stepping it up.
I'm a 23 year old virgin. I've masturbated in ways you can't even imagine.
She dumped a fish bowl of alcohol on herself. Just like flash dance.
she chugged a bowl of salsa and then gave my ferret weight loss tips. she's like my fucking spirit animal now
Just peed on my foot. Thank you Sunday hangovers.
sriracha body shots, that's gonna be a thing
it's like you just said "i want you to suffer"
I'm gonna hop on that dick and ride it into the sunset
That's why my New Years resolution was no more blondes. They're all bad news
Just remember: We don't tell our English professor about our fetishes unless she specifically asks about them.
Fuck. I think I can already feel tomorrow's hangover. It's like future me cane back to warn present me about the impending doom but didn't turn the time dial back far enough.
We made a blanket fort in my dorm room and fucked in it. Twice. I'm in love.
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