She had hickeys... what's up with that?? HAHAHA
Have you ever seen a 300 pound pregnant lady's boob fall out of her shirt cuz she's not wearing a bra? I have.
i want tt clbm rinabw nd ride uncrn
what?
i wnt tto climb a rainboww and ride a unicornnnnnnnnn
She was so drunk that I kept trying to switch out her wine for water. Sort of like Jesus, but in reverse.
Whoa. I woke up to 10 new text messages. All about bacon.
could you please tell me why you thought vodka soaked band aids were a good idea?
I was just reelected president of justgotlaidsylvania
Lmfao I'm not trying to have a pissing contest over acid with my mom.....
I should have been on a postcard. I was sitting in the middle of the forest with a plate full of pot brownies and missing you.
Still breathing?
Still breathing , but quite out of it. I think I hallucinated like 20 action sequences.
What.
He's pretty cool once you ignore the fact that he's trying to get into your pants
"what's it like being a dancer turned stoner" well, i can change the netflix using my feet mid bongrip, so there's that.
IM AT A ROOFTOP FUNDRAISER LOOKING OVER THE WHITE HOUSE I WILL NOT RUIN MYSELF
I'm now at a gay bar with our relatives
YOUR MANICOTTI IS FULL OF LIES
Sorry i meant to send that to my mom
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