That's the last time we joust in Radio Flyer wagons after margarita night.
You know you had a bad blackout when you forget you held the stanley cup.
Legitimate logistical question....how did you pee in your duct tape dress?
Blackout me just wants to pee on sober me's dreams. Literally.
I thought I was invisible, then some guy flashed his high beams at me and I realized my lights weren't on...not invisible.
her 18 year old son fed me pieces of a french roll like a pigeon, as I lay on the floor of the bathroom crying.
Had a turkey baster with clean pee in it in my pants to pass a drug test, and the bottom fell off, so yeah I'm pretty pissed.
Waking up in a NH rest stop and reading through my texts is definitely a familiar low
so i EARNED it!?! i EARNED dying alone with cats!!?
Holy shit, I just successfully took and sent a boob pic AT MY DESK I have conquered an entire new level of skill.
This is not my bathroom and these are not my pants
Please come collect your inebriated significant other. He just sleep-farted and scared my cats. Please hurry.
Remember when we used to smoke out of an apple at the playground? Those were some precious moments
I had sex in the tube at that same playground once. That park is full of memories.
Help. Why am I so naked?
Adulthood is putting your bongs in the dishwasher because you're too lazy to clean them manually.
Are you ok dude?
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