Considering the face that your still in jail Im gunna go with no.
i have a new swear word: supercalifuckaliciousexpialadamnit
Shaq going to Cleveland; Vince Carter to the Magic; Michael Jackson, Farrah Fawcett, and Ed McMahon die.... ARMAGEDDON IS UPON US!!!!!
almost passed out on the way to class today.. laid down in a construction site. bad idea
you're just mad cause i madeout with you while having a mouth full of chewed pretzels
It's gotten to the point that the dirty talk in my head when I touch myself has your accent
I can't tell if they're having sex or watching the beach scene from Saving Private Ryan. All I know is I hear explosions and men screaming and crying
But the ghost of his schlong past haunts you
Whatever, consider condoms an eighteen year investment.
I could probably save all of the money I would have spent on condoms and put a kid through college.
I got pushed into some bald man in the pit and spent the next few minutes with my face against his head. Man I love ecstasy.
I almost put an adult beverage in my sippy cup for the beach but realized the next step would be rehab.
No the next step is being buzzed at the beach. I would've.
Last night I got drunk on margaritas at an Irish pub and came home with only one shoe. I have to get my shit together.
You really know how to show Monday who's boss.
But if you move out who will get drunk with me on the roof and yell at boys?!?
She called to tell me she just hooked up with my crush...and that he talked about me...not sure if I should be pissed or excited?
I got confused. The music was loud, porn was playing, people were grinding, there were hand jobs.
Randomize