that john and kate plus 8 dude has ruined asians for me
Why were you high on a thursday?
today's a wednesday
I asked first.
I seriously love my fucking boobs. They are so boobs.
Not me. I think "beastiality" sounds pretty classy.
The parties out here are fucking awesome and I've got the grades to prove it.
Is moral bankruptcy something you need to file for?
Cancel that soberness update. I just almost fell down in the security line
Halloween is the only night where I would ever end up getting a guy's makeup all over my face
I am officially now FB friends with my arresting officer.
I said that I'm avoiding parties and guys, and the freshman girl just laughed
I was sending him tit pics while watching how to train your dragon 2. It was everything.
Foreplay went from me being a bank teller and him a customer to us actually having to go to the bank so we would make rent
It makes me so happy that my local liquor store has a black lab that is there every day. Really tho - it makes the higher prices excusable.
Was it a bad idea to have spent all of my tax return on coke?
Can you recommend a quality dick? I haven’t had a good sexing in a while
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