hdsncx Gizmo asnqw toilet blanasdi
ok, stay where you are, be there soon
low key just jizzed in a chinese food container
Is there any way you can check to see if I have a warrant out in Alabama?
I'm afraid to text her because most of the time she just replies with "cockblock."
Just think. Tomorrow you'll wake up, shower, and get your brains fucked out. That's your ice cream. Today is your peas and carrots.
I will give you 100$, a blow job a day for a month and I will shave my legs according to societal standards until next November if you come recuse me from my night class right NOW.
I cooked you Mac and cheese when I was drunk and drugged. That counts for about 4 meals. Try harder
sounds like it. if it makes you feel better i blew up a $75000 farm tractor last night.
I told him I wanted to "ride him like a show pony" I think he gets the picture
You serve our country by fighting in the sandbox, i serve our country by entertaining rich businessmans' daughters. We each do our part.
Pro: Drunk Portland Strip Club. Con: Monday morning hangover at work. Pro: boobs. Con: Sleep deprivation. The Pro's are winning.
I would agree. Add some coffee to the booze. It will cut down on sleep deprivation.
My doctor said I can only have one drink at a time, ever, from now on. My life has officially started its decline.
I think putting on real pants was half my issue with today
We can only continue to use the "oh what's the difference between circumcised and uncircumcised" for a few more months before people will see through our lies
She deleted me on Facebook. I think it's safe to say that she knows I fucked him now.
Randomize
