I just woke up in the coolest sweatsuit i have ever seen..it has cory's name on the tag...do we know a cory?
So he says he needs "alone time" a day that he doesnt have to deal with anyone. should i be concerned?
I think in guy language thats " Im fucking someone else and dont want u catching me"
oh btw spread eagle is not an appropriate phrase to use in a scientific presentation. learned that the hard way
having sex with him was like banging macgyver. he did the most amazing shit with the simplest things
How long does it take to cook a corndog over a candle?
She got a digital picture frame for her birthday. FINALLY - a place for me to sneak all those penis shots I've taken with my iPhone.
How drunk are u on a scale of one to couldn't get it up if u had a gun at ur head?
Just did a drug deal on the toy aisle at walmart, Merry Christmas
Wesley I'm sober and my body hurts. There wasn't much trust in any of those falls.
Turns out the dorm toilet can't take a punch. Gonna be a long year without Mexican food.
I can't even be mad at customs in houstons airport anymore for missing my flight and having to stay overnight. Within an hour of meeting we did it at her place. Her last word being "glad I could show you real southern hospitality". I'm definitely coming back here someday
She said she was sober from drugs for a week. All I heard was Kenny Loggins singing Danger Zone.
Don't mind me, I'm just walking 2 miles across campus with no jacket, covered in highlighter, and carrying a hair extension. Gotta love miami!
I need your opinion, is it ACTUALLY sweet that a booty call offered to walk me home with an umbrella because it was raining, or is that just low standards?
In my life time, I want nothing more than to get a blow job while watching Space Jam.
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