Is this going to be a big send off or a somber occasion? Just need to know if I should start drinking on the train or not.
no more stoned jack in the box. this is the third night in a row.
You stole her cigarette screaming that you were going to stop the air cancer from getting everyone.
at least i was looking out for everybody
Someone in my class is wearing shirt and on the back it says...National Bible Quiz Finalist 2006. Do you really expect me to find a guy here
hows a nice way to say "yeah i would go to your dorm, but it's snowing and I know you're not going to blow me, so what's the point"?
Two penises later: I might be straighter than I think.
Its official, drinking for 15 hours counts as a suicide attempt
I fucked your brother... Hey, at least we know he is not gay... You're welcome.
It sounds like heaven mixed with world peace and orgasms. The acoustics in this car are awesome. Or it's the weed idk either way it's great
seis de mayo is my least favoite holiday because i usually spend it in bed sobbing over my poor life decisions from the night before.
Mixed review. I fucked her in the river, but then we were assaulted by ducks.
I'm currently deliberating if I'm going to be too drunk on New Years to handle wearing false eyelashes.
I tried smoking while wearing a horse mask, it was the worst thing I've ever smelled
Somehow reaching for the flaming hot cheetos ended up in the best sex of my life
my favorite part of this morning was sitting at the gynecologist smelling like cigarettes and wearing yesterday's clothes.
Randomize
