Just got my rental car in Iowa...gas is under 2 dollars in des moines...this is not a real state
Gayer than 8 guys blowing 9 guys
wow, that really makes you stop and think.
On that note; HAPPY 21: THE SEQUEL from the back of an ambulance!!
When we started taking double shots of vodka and chasing it with a lick of fruit roll-ups, I knew there'd be hell to pay in the morning.
It's taken me 5 years and 2 beers to finally realize that maybe he isn't the dude for me. Also, that picking your major should be done sober, lest you find your self an art major.
How are ur friends?
One is peeing in the grass and the other is asleep under the stairs. Fuck them I'm sleeping in the car
We got kicked out of Walmart for playing cod with squirt guns of course it was better then prom.
There is a 90 percent chance I threw up in a mailbox last night....
I just said give me penis or give me death. Some patriot is rolling around in his grave right now.
I asked Tony because I knew he wouldn't give me a lecture about consequences
???? Tony IS a lecture about consequences
I need an office. I have big plans. I'm learning spanish this month.
Yeah plus that night got so disgusting it's basically a repressed memory anyway
I danced shirtless on a platform with a fucking stripper who went to MIT
It was sweet, he carried me out of my bathroom after I passed out, built me a pillow fort so I wouldn't roll out of bed, set a glass of water on the table, and brought me a mixing bowl to puke in. Totally a sign we're more than just fuckbuddies.
How drunk were you? in an effort to seduce him, you demonstrated your lap dance skillz on his dog.
Randomize
