how do you spell 'special'? like slow?
S P E L L C H E C K
No you dumbass thats not right
Every morning i wake up and check his twitter like a horoscope
Rooting for you and your team in the Beer Olympics this afternoon...! Love you, Mom
Judging by the amount of alcohol multiplied by the amount of her exes here, tonight will be ending in tears.
i can't believe you just compared my dick to leprosy
he got kicked out of the bar for falling asleep on the mechanical bull.. then freaked on us cause we wouldnt go to the strip club with him
his version of basketball was throwing hot sauce packets down my cleavage at taco bell at 2 am with his buddy.the cashier kept score
I slipped in the shower today and broke my lighter..
I think that all guys are assholes, some of them just have less assholeish qualities that we accept in our lives and that we can look past enough to deal. They have to be a pretty special asshole.
I know. In fairness he did tell me to throw up out his window onto his roof so I don't think he's pissed at me but I'm still mortified by the whole situation.
roommates are droppin acid, i really should stop them from staring directly at the light bulb, but their giggles are so enchanting.
When you start lapping your martini like a cat it's time to go home. Partys over.
You got into an extremely loud argument with a juggalo and slapped him, he started crying and everyone cheered.
I remember that, it happened before I started drinking. I thought you said I did something shameful?
i just cleaned my bong... I do not feel healthy
We're just starting to open presents and I already need a shot. This is gonna be a long Christmas day.
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