Yes, it's true. 4 fingers.
it hurts more in the daytime
if i get an abortion, then will you go out with me?
thanks for brining me home and putting me in my bed. the pillow fort your built around me is also appreciated.
i think i'd rather have a trophy of a like jizz stained curtain or something
You do realize that we bought beer at 9:30 in the morning to avoid sobering up. Stupidity was bound to follow.
It's okay though. My mom didn't believe that they were mine cuz they were magnums. Having a surprisingly large penis ftw
This drunk girl wants you to know that I do actually like you. I'm not just using you for sex. I think you're cool.
We fed him just...so many bright colored crayons when he was blacked out. I hope he looks at his shits because this could be all for nothing
Please tell me last night did not happen and there is another reason why my phone smells like ranch sauce ahahah
I feel like I was playing penis roulette last night nd I landed on the wrong one.
The candles are lit, the magic circle is drawn, now all we need to do is get naked and see how many orgasms we can manage.
Sooo I ended up ugly crying at the drive thru window at 10 pm last night....how was your valentine's day?
Well what did you order
Bowls and Harry Potter this morning. I guess work isn't so bad after all
My sister gave me satin sheets. We can fuck on satin sheets.
Randomize
