This is clearly one of those "A hole's a hole" situations
he promised me brunch in the morning so i felt like it was ok....i really need to get a job.
I had a dream last night where you were a transsexual in a low cut blue dress with lovely long brown hair. You were very pretty. I hope you are well.
I can't get out of the parking garage so now I'm staying downtown....Typical
never try to heat up a hot pocket in the dryer if ur microwave breaks...bad idea.
four guys that i have slept with have come into my job today. FOUR. i feel like it's like bring your sex partners to work day.
It is official. It's the year of doin married chicks. Similar to the year of virgins but without all the baggage.
hungover waitressing a bar association event. im being judged by actual judges.
I love shooting for the middle. Those girls never wake up well.
We had a deepthroating contest with breadsticks at Olive Garden
You have to sext the same way you right a resume, you can only use active verbs
I feel like you're gonna be reading this at 6 AM in a ditch or under a bridge, but please remember...I offered to drive you home. And you said no.
The sad thing is that it's 6:45 and you're not far off.
My date ended with her leaving the bar with that guy who used to jerk off in the back of the school bus.
A to Z: fucking your way through the alphabet
It'll be a kids book
I think sunday funday got a little out of control. There is cheese slices and BBQ sauce all over the roof and 4 empty bottles of vodka in my room.
Randomize
