Nope, Im Irish and pissed with some drunk mixed in...therefore punching things is the best solution to every problem.
i just overheard a girl at the next table saying she gave up sex for lent
don't you ever do that...
thanks for stopping by when you did. making a meatball quesadilla while high was a bad choice
i googled waterboarding like you asked. as long as you do it outside. we have carpet. but i wont be a part of it.
I seriously just caught my Pina colada from falling of a table perfectly facing up. I will now reward myself by finishing this one and then getting my 8th
my taxi driver is listening to 50 shades of grey audiobook. this is uncomfortable.
Wake up. We're going shopping for booze and samurai swords.
Im currently watching two girls making out. In the library. Hope your studying is going as good as mine is. Haha
am i new drunk or am i still drunk
for real. if he messaged me that i'd have made his penis cower in a corner.
How do I cancel buying spotify premium for two homeless people?
I think someone cast a spell on the lazy stoner rich boy stereotype and it came to life and called me.
I smoked all his weed and he hasn't noticed yet. But I might need a place to crash when he does
Found this cake smashed up inside a box on the sidewalk. Im saying yes to adventure and eating some.
Taking a nap. Sidewalk cake kicked my ass. It had boston creme filling!
You were in the back of the cop car and told the cop to ask me if I got laid. Youre a dedicated wingman.
Randomize
