Oh My! A car just drove by me a splashed me with a wave of water. I am drenched and soaking wet!
I am sorry--all I heard is that you are wet.
She put her phone in her underwear and it somehow managed to work it's way into her vagina. she has a BLACKBERRY.
Girls only wine night turned into a sloppy drunk lesbian orgy again
Sign #1 that I'm not ready to be a mother: I'm shopping for "maternity fishnets".
Was the mom I hooked up with decently attractive I feel like her two friends were hotter
It's like I'm in a vicious cycle of noncommittal penis.
I got concerned once i realized you weren't there to hear us having sex. See I do worry about you.
They said I was more of a mess than the German. I have achieved the unachievable, you may bow down to me
According to you, you were with your "Eskimo bro for life" last night.
I'm in the freezer. Shit took away any trace of hangover outa my body.
Get here, there are important joints to be smoked and pies to be eaten
You shall now refer to my vagina as patty and patty only
If we all have the time, and the weather permits, and you have no plans, we should have another go at Operation Get Our Carless Friends Laid. All the lonely people will be out. We can take our lonely people out too.
I'm sorry I keep having sex wth your friends. I'm done, for real. Unless cole is interested. Other than that, I'm done.
Tequila shots and throwing it at a bell.
This is dumb. I'll keep doing it.
Randomize
