I mean she's dancing like an epileptic patato and i'd like to slap her
I love how you send me nude pics of girls you're fucking and name them by which city they're in instead of their name. "This is Nashville, this is Tupelo, this is Jackson..."
so far i wrote 500 words for a paper on sean paul performing we be burnin..i can officially do anything on adderral
just witnessed some guy trade his friend $5 and a condom for his keys.
there is no way i'm buying plan b and condoms at the same time
no do it! it shows that you acknowledge your mistakes and you are proactively working towards a solution.
She's "scared" of blowjobs, so she just played with it for a while.
her cat was choking so she kept trying to stick her finger in her cat's mouth while saying "it's okay kitty, just do what mommy does"
I miss you more than I would miss junk food if I went on a diet. And you've seen me eat, you know how desperate I'd be.
My homemade mace ate through its aluminum container. I make awesome mace.
I am just glad I was home to catch most of it, cause it smells BAD.
I'm not a scientist but that could be because it's homemade mace. That is however just a hypothesis
I already left my house once this summer. Maybe we could do something in October.
You keep making the old jokes & I'm gonna come down with a sudden case of low-estrogen related vaginal dryness..
go for it girl, the world is ur dick oyster
i texted "amiibo vore" to my insurance agent instead of someone else. do you think they'll raise my rates out of disgust?
I’m mid 4sum and you’re sending me photos of your cat. We had very different evenings.
He is 6'5, went to a Christian school and he's a violinist....I'm going to fuck the jesus right out of him.
Randomize
