White coat. Heels.
Dear man in the lobby please go play whith yourself elsewhere
I couldn't tell if he was hitting on me or if he was just mentally challenged.
He once got bit in the face by a dog and still got laid the same night. He owns Memorial Day Weekend
Well if all fails we can always become surrogate mothers. I hear that pays well.
Not sure if it is a new high or new low, but i left a basket on the porch of the sorority I woke up at. It had a description of the Minnie Mouse I woke up next to, and Plan B.
It looks like sephora exploded on his dick, so i assumed I was the second girl that gave him head that night.
Before I roll over explain to me why you're naked and on my floor.
Brian got his first ever blow job last night. We should make him a scrapbook.
Nothings harder than putting on a frozen condom.. or should I say softer
This may be a weird question to ask someone who is 21 years old, but are you grounded?
BUT YOU MUST FINISH YOUR QUEST
TO FIND THE HOLY GRAIL
AND GET DRUNK OFF YOUR ASS BY DRINKING OUT OF IT
if elf comes on TV one more time i swear to god i will smash my brains out with this fruitcake
sorry for pouring tequila vodka and whiskey down your throat and left you to sleep on a table
His middle name is Julius so I named his penis Caesar and told him he has to say "Hail Caesar!" whenever he comes. He didn't seem to like the idea, though.
Randomize
