Nicole vs. Life
im getting my college education on yahoo answers.
My plan for valentine's day: take a shot for every guy I've slept with. To keep me from going to the hospital I'm only doing half a shot for small dicks
im trying not to drink and cry in the same night anymore. i'll let you know how it goes
im gonna call it quits for tonight... I am so drunk I dont even have the motor skills to masturbate
he just made me youtube cheetahs running and he thinks he is in a pool
how was ur day?
this is strictly sexting don't make small talk.
Tell him to dress up like Shaggy and kidnap him then bring him to me. We can pretend. Imaagination.
Turns out the average person our age has never run from the cops. Life: we're doing it right.
Just letting everyone know that I am still alive after last night. On a related note, this is the 15th "I'm not dead!" mass text I've sent. You've got to celebrate the little things.
You have got to be the only man who has passed out while getting a lap dance.
Noo not in a booty call way, in a 'How are your abs and penis doing today?' sort of way.
I just lived through a real life episode of jersey shore.
I think I may have gotten way too used to using my boobs as an extra hand/pocket...almost stabbed myself in the chin bc I forgot I put my fork there
Gonna do a few lines then clean my room so I can feel like my life is somewhat in order.
Randomize
