That arnold schwarzeneger picture looks strikingly similar to paul
Not half as good looking as paul
I'd say paul has bigger bicep peaks, but who am I to judge
Literally just as i started to cum the church bells next ot my house began to ring. either it was the most epic timing ever or god was watching and congratulating me
This Xanax laced vodka tonic will help me forget that all these spring breakers are all young enough to have been my students.
Dude she flew me 1000 miles down to see her, broke up with me 7 hrs after arrival, and kicked me out with a week left til I fly home. Thank god college taught me how to shack up
I am going to wait until he wakes up to set his couch on fire and then pee it out. That way he knows it was not an accident.
I literally told her "she's a sandwich I'd like to make" and that's all it took
I'm back here naked if anyones wondering
This breakup hit defcon 5. Walked to pathmark with a denim jacket over my nightgown to get ben and jerrys. On sale btw.
I know more about this girls vagina than I know about her personality
My penis needs a shock collar
He's a doctor now.. hope he can cure his small dick
Can we table this discussion? The roommate is out of town and I have to eat pie on the couch in my underwear.
Captain Morgan does not know self control. Nor does he teach it.
Are you in a good mood because I stuffed you with enchiladas, ice cream, penis, and cuddles last night?
Is she still on a quest to lick every stranger that enters the bar, or have the restraining orders reached critical mass?
Randomize
