I think we need to take a brake
What upsets me the most about that is that you spelt it 'brake'
just got cropdusted by the delivery guy...this was not in my job description.
I could literally track my booty calls if I ever got knocked up by my parking tickets
We need to talk about our relationship.
I just won a bet involving 10 tequila shots. You've got about 3 minutes
I'm not an expert but calling her the "hot lesbian" isn't going to coerce her into a 3some with you
he suggested we do it doggy style cuz it was his dead dogs birthday...i had to do it
How do I explain the handcuffs and tanning goggles on our living room floor? There's rope too. The cats love the rope.
He started using my brother's rc helicopter as a beer delivery device. He's a drunk McGyver.
I was peeing in the bathroom at this house party when a guy just casually stumbles out of the shower
Enjoy the penises
Hey, Would it be ok if me and your wife have a ladies only night and masturbated on FaceTime together?
I will take a ruler to your dick so help me god
If your talking about a poncho I WANT ONE
So. Um. Hypothetically speaking...how would one get a squirrel out of the house?
I didn't mean that as an expression. I'm literally asking if you want to watch Netflix and do nothing.
Randomize
