I think I just saw the silver monkey from legends of the hidden temple sitting out in someone's trash
GO. BACK. NOW.
Just watched a guy pause a bluetooth convo to puke outside of esso. gotta love orangeville
Maybe my heart is located in my vagina
the can pyramid on my head actually reached a decent height before I moved.
Well, think of it this way, if this were 200 years ago your father would have received the most goats in all the village for your fertile loins. Think about that.
The family from the blindsided came and talked to us last night. The dad owns 68 taco bells. You would have been so inspired
i just bought plan b at the bus station. happy holidays and welcome to a new level of white trashiness.
I hope they realize that to me "collecting their mail" is synonymous with "fucking in every room in their house, and twice in the party shower."
And on that day, Satan said; "Let there be the friend zone and let us get fucking high." while Jesus silently cried in the background.
I'm at a gyno in Japan. Safe to say every possible rule of etiquette is about to be broken. Buckle up, motherfuckers.
And my nipple is sore from him biting it. That is not a complaint.
So what if I got a tattoo on a bus, it was sterile.
I'm not going out, it's sweat pants and gallon vodka night at my place and I'm the only one on the guest list.
This is because you lost at fooseball isn't it?
Smoked a joint with mom, best Thanksgiving ever!
Fun fact: deep throating plus dehydration plus eating a lot of citrus = my throat is fucked. Metaphorically and physically.
Randomize
