At lowes after workin outside. Kid behind me says "mommy that man smells like a taco" yes she was talking about me.
Its a three day weekend with Valentines day thrown in... Im obligated to get drunk
Make sure to show her the sewer we were arrested in on your tour.
Are you asking me on a date where we get shithoused and do some fingerpainting?
Whiskey and I have a long and stories tradition of excellence
Would it be sharing too much to tell you that my nipples hurt so much that I couldn't comfortably go down the stairs?
I drew a nude short fat middle aged woman today and liked it
It was honestly one of my favorite days in art class except for the 20 min she faced me and kept looking at me and we made eye contact
I'm over my straight phase. They all turned out to be idiots and none of them got me off. I'm going back to hot girls with strap ons.
He uses Bing as his search engine...but he's great in bed. So obviously I'm torn.
He said he loves me but he haven't eaten me out yet. So I don't think he means it.
I wonder whether Megan will forgive me if i have phone sex in her attic
I'm no longer puke free since 2013 am I.
As for the other mouse...I don't have any mouse traps so I put a Jell-O shot on the ground. Party hard little dude.
Good for you, kid with a beer in hand as you walk to your 11 am class.
I thought this was a dry campus.
That means you have to bring your own beer from home.
It was like a single vaginal boat in a sea of one eyed monsters
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