Don't you think facebook is a bit pretentious, suggesting friends and all? No facebook, I would NOT like to be friends with a girl whose fiancee I have slept with.
why is it impossible to run with a back pack without looking like a giant d-bag?
haha... you gave me a great visual of you in high white socks running with a backpack with eye of the tiger playing in the background
that only happened once.
i woke up to her playing with my penis. just wiggling it around and around. awkward night? i would say so.
i wonder what thom yorke's orgasms sound like
Anyway, my grandfather thinks you're attractive
i wish there was a 'silent except for booty calls' volume level on my phone
he's been in the country 4 hours and we just did it in the closet. he called me "miss flirtatious in the cupboard." i'm in love.
the creek. my friends left me at a party next thing i know im in a breaststroke relay race with a bunch of randos in the dark
I am nonfunctional stoned. I had to ask ben to put me somewhere away from all the people I'm sitting on someones bed watching a wall. Not alright. Should not have come.
I just wanna be like "dude your gf's on a porn site" but i just dont know if i have the heart.
What if there is no right person? Maybe it's just the right cat. Or the right 12 cats.
Just cried watching Wimbledon, worst comedown ever.
No biggie, just trying to keep my liver function in the green
I mean, I let him sleep with me after we both ate taco bell sober... That's kinda like love, right?
I gave him a hand job in the parking lot... now he thinks we're meant for each other...
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