stupid gm bankruptcy made me miss the showcase showdown
Those cock suckers. We need to know who's winning the hot tub and the vacation to the alps
And then he asked me why the subtitles were in Arabic. The television was off.
I think hes settled down now. He's just licking the walls and the windows.
We are two peas in an std pod
Are you seriously trying to guilt me into sending you naked pictures by saying "So I can look at them during dialysis" ?
Is it working?
I never thought I'd say this, but there is a life threatening amount of rumpleminz in our freezer
I have Retrograde Ejaculation as a side effect from one of my meds. Is this a respectable form of birth control?
They let me keep the giant cocktail glass because I threw up in it. And made out with the bartender. Europeans are so generous. I'm getting it engraved
I meant to thank you again for giving up a potential interracial threesome to come to my party. I'm glad you stayed!
I just offered a cat a "drinky drinky" I'd say my night has started
And you said I'm not athletic, I rubbed one out with my sports band on, it's the same as walking 1/4 mile.
There is a video of you making out with him, flipping off the camera, and holding the plastic flamigo that you had just stolen out of a yard
i dont think sending her flowers will make her forgive you running over her foot.
are you really asking me this. do you KNOW how many times i masturbate in a day? yeah. wrong person to ask about romance.
chipped my right front tooth on a toilette. i figure if i keep drinking i won't care for at least 2 days
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