Picture the opening band right now: euro, beer guts, one member in oversized hipster lumberjack apparel, the other in childsized american apparel and shorts. Singing in german.
you thought that fire hydrant was a midget...you gave it a hug and asked for a lollipop.
you would think someone who fights for his country could fight to last longer than 2 minutes
Fact: Telling a guy he has erectile dysfunction doesn't solve the problem.
Just saw a guy doing jumping jacks at the gym. I don't even have to create a punch line for that
FYI the landlord called, said we need to clean the puke off the side of the house...was someone on the roof lastnight??
Im not spending 10 to get hit on by potential transexuals even if they are cuter than most of the girls I dated.
You basically told your boyfriend at the time you were going to shit in his hands.
And I meant every ounce of it.
Carry on my wayward bro, there'll be beer when you get low. lay your neon tank to rest, dont you rage no more.
I know he is still a student. I am not asking if his being an underwear model makes it more ethical, just less prosocutable.
If its possible to have a hickey on your nipple, I have one. Thank you.
I'm wearing the monkey suit out tonight. I hope you're ok with it leaving the bedroom
I can check masterbating in China off the bucket list.
No no no, I want to share him with you. Think of it as me sharing a piece of delicious pie with you. He was THAT GOOD.
I have post one night stand depression
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