you kept yelling 'bird cage' in between songs and finally the lead singer stopped to ask if you meant 'free bird' and you said 'fuck you, i'm not gay', needless to say you were kindly escorted out
i soberly give you permission to do that to me when im drunk
If I had a penis I would totaly hang shit off it. Like stretched out peach rings and fruit rollups.
Then you jumped off your bed with your arms outstretched, yelled "I'm Goliath, watch out New York!" and then began singing the Gargoyles theme song as you 'soared' around your room.
Don't be ridiculous, the Gargoyles theme song has no words. How could I sing that mess?
You just started going "da da da da da! da da da da da! DA DA!!" then going "swoosh" as you glided about.
I just got a high school volleyball teams practice cancelled because I slept with the head coach through their practice time.
Who would win... a chainsaw pooping pterodactyl or a bear with machine guns for feet. big debate about this right now
I'm promising sexual favors in return for his responsible life decisions. Now THIS is growing up.
I think my multiple attempts of taking his life, no matter how unintentional they were, has put a damper on our friendship
i looked up and she was looking over the stall watching me pee and told me to unlock the door. that dedicated to sucking my dick.
Come my child we shall walk thru the pasture of amazing sex and corndogs. Hint:some corndogs are not corndogs.
I hope you have a dream of a sloth with my face touching you erotically
He yelled at me to keep it in my pants and I replied with I will fuck your roommate as much as I please. Oops
I got the job! The hiring manager is the sister of a guy I slept with so its like I'm a real adult now
You never know true fear until you're on your period in a house full of white furniture.
I'm at the nutcracker high as shit. It's so beautiful. I cried.
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