Tickle wars 95% of the time end in sex.
Im drinking a beer thats called vuuve which is boobs in begian. I think my life is complete.
I am not hooking up with him just to see what his penis looks like.
I don't know what I could have possibly done in a past life to deserve watching my boyfriend projectile vomit margaritas and probs blood while completely naked.
You know your in college when you decide house chores with games of beer pong...
He suggested abortion before I finished the sentence. That was my plan too, but now I feel like should keep it just to prove how big of a dick he is.
Kill yourself wednesday started off with a bang, and im pretty sure im still drunk from tequila tuesday.
his extensive knowledge of the age of consent laws kinda scares me....
all i wanna do is drink skittled vodka, fuck my gf, and pass out in my neighbors hot tub naked
Reunion weekend was a success. Had 3 ex's inside my vag. Hat trick!
Just got flashed by an entire bus of girls in school uniforms. We then had to wait beside each other at a light. It was awkward.
This chick at the gym, just informed me I was super funny this weekend. Especially when I untied her friends bikini top after throwing up in the women's restroom. SWEET black out chronicles has another story
STOP SENDING ME NAKED PICTURES WHEN I'M TRYING TO TEACH. MONDAY TUESDAY 1-3 IS A DICK AND ARSE FREE ZONE
Some mornings I close deals. Other mornings I puke out my window while I’m driving down the highway
why is there a thong in the fridge-NOT MINE-and a half of a pickle on the stairs?!
I don't wear thongs. The picle was for dipping. Ill explain later. Lacy or plain thong ?
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