i could totally date him if i was just drunk the whole relationship
Im at the zoo right now high out of my mind and feel as if the animals are watching me and Im the one in a cage.
This morning I proved to myself and all the kids on the playground that I can't puke and drive.
Some dude just came up to me and stroked my beard, smiled and left. Shave?
threw up in the library. i should be embarrassed, but i'm willing to bet that i'm one of the first so i'm kinda proud.
Oh by the way, john gave me your shirt to return to you when I was at work today. I almost gave him his girlfriends underwear to return to her but figured it would be inappropriate.
he looks SO much like Drake, I feel like an extreme groupie every time we have sex.
I punted my pants across my apt at my roommate last night. Everything else is kinda fuzzy.
At some point, it turned less into sparring and more into tough guy dry humping.
I am naked in a blanket sprawled on my bed eating a pastry. This is all I want out of life. Ever.
Guess who has two thumbs and broke her boyfriends dick?
Just keep your throat open and beer will always find its way in.
He looks like an accountant with a secret kinky candy filled center.
The career specialist read an Onion article to us. Please send help.
I got eaten out in the igloo at snow-kings castle last night.My thighs were literally melting ruts in the ice bench.Definitely colder than the minus 40 blowjob at Desiree's wedding
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