We hit a deer, sort of a buzz kill. But it's fine.
Do vagina's smell?
for future reference: even when 4 loko is flat it still fucks you up. im near a tree. come find me.
You coming bye my yot got egg sweet carilne vodklaa
I just want to see him this morning so I can bask in my wasted accomplishment.
it took us a while to figure out sex on a tire swing, buuuuuuuut MISSION ACCOMPLISHED
Well he can play the xylophone with his erect cock... So he's got that going for him
I think Facebook knows you fucked me. All of a sudden I get everything you do in my news feed.
Speaking of mom and dad and Halloween... Mom bought a size small slutty nurse outfit last night. So yeah, they're getting hammered
like are we talking 'quick beer' bad or 'break out the real vodka' bad
The lowest point of my life has been reached. I just drank half a jar of pasta sauce.
I threw up in my backpack last night, but at least it wasn't in the pizza box again
My professor just asked for my number. Not fucking her till after finals though I learned my lesson last time.
Woke up at my x's house. He said I talked about how much I love panda's for fourty five minutes. Then made him watch The Little Mermaid with me. Made the walk of shame infront of his mom. Things can only really go up from here.
Wait till you get home.
This chick just walked out of the men's room with molly all over her nose and her shirt half unbuttoned. She nodded to all of us and said "gentlemen" as she exited
Randomize
