I want to touch your soul through your body...with my penis...
Mike i'm at church right now...
Mind blown. Apparently, it's PRErogative, not PERogative. I blame Bobby Brown.
If she catches me sniffing the seat of her office chair again, she's either going to fire me or fuck me
So I used to make fun of texas a lot, then I got here and I found a place where I could get my tequila in a to go cup with a straw and I realized that this is the only place I ever want to be
She said she never had to courage to go fully shaved. Since when did shaving your snatch become courageous?
It was worth having to clean the cum stains out of the carpet.
He wants to make love to me in a sea of paint and wash my tears away with the brushes surrounding us..I've known him for 2 days.
Nice. I ate a jello shot out of a bovine blow up doll's love hole last night
Yes. Yes. Double yes. I'll bring the tits. You bring the frosting.
I really want to throw this drink in your face but it was 6 dollars that shits expensive
Hahahaha who is sleeping in the garage on our beer pong table?
So you get idea of what my night was like, I woke up this morning and the back of my head was orange
of course the one day I come to class high we have guest speakers from the police department... Just my luck
As for the other mouse...I don't have any mouse traps so I put a Jell-O shot on the ground. Party hard little dude.
So turns out my new assistant isn't really my assistant. The owner needed a title for his FWB so his wife wouldn't catch on. I got a three hundred a month credit limit boost on my corporate credit card instead.
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