Going to bed naked. Too bad I am all alone. Need to make some changes. Either sleep with clothes or with you
I dated that bitch for 9 months and didnt get as much as a hand job. I met her sister last night for the first time and smashed that...twice
I respect that
I just had a flashback to last nights party, I'm pretty sure I told most of the people there that I post a masturbation schedule for an iCal download.
Wat the fuck dude ketchup in my bong???
Someone in a vagina costume on campus.
I think theres a high possibility i could be flammable.
You misunderstood me....i wasnt asking and it is not negotiable
You're making this sound more like a hostage situation than a booty call.
thank god we only have to drink eggnog and rum once a year. It taste like shit.
You got into a heated argument about Frankenstein's intelligence while double fisting burritos from taco bell.
does doing it on an automatic sink count as shower sex?
Sex in the moonbounce later?
This is why I love you.
I reek of vagina.. My cab driver commented.
Jello shots and homoerotic movie scenes bingo?
Edible... I FEEL CLOSER TO THE UNIVERSE AND I DEF TRAVELED IN TIME. I THINK I CAN READ MINDS NOW.
We got to the hospital and the girls who caused the accident had already added you on facebook.
Randomize
