you really need to stop walk of shaming home from theme parties.
Just saw a squirrel crossing the road in a crosswalk..my morning has improved exponentially.
Facebook is used to stalk your friends, Twitter is used to stalk celebritie=s, and Myspace is used to stalk underaged girls. Everything else is porn. T=he Internet in a nutshell.
I just sat through a State Farm mortgage Insurance commercial to watch a Trick Daddy video. Is this the target audience they are going for here?
good news. according to wikipedia, my blackout might just have been "post-trauma amnesia"
its not a party unless mikie exposes himself
Horrible. I told her my girlfriend is in the hospital and she tried to give me a lapdance.
I expected to wake up with a sext of you posing nude and all I got was a missed call.....disappointed.
I'm sorry I think it was because I lost a chicken nugget in my purse and that's all that was on my mind until 4am
True that.. I am going to ride a gold plated unicorn across a field of cocaine and coach purses when I graduate.
That was beautiful.
And then we were riding the keg in the pool like an 8 second rodeo...naked.
Apparently I still called the officer "sir" despite the fact I was at a .21 BAC. Southern girls are raised right
You knew you'd end up at his house the minute you emptied the bowl of condoms into your purse.
I'd say "I think I gave my TA chlamydia" is an accurate way to sum up my life.
i woke up between my boyfriend and his sister and i don't know if we fucked or cried together
I think someone shaved off all their pubes in the handicap stall or a werewolf stopped by the office to take a crAzy dump!
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