i am sick of getting naked and seeing how fat i am.
And God said, "Let there be Twilight," and it was so.
I should injure you considerably.
he called me a worthless slut and then went 2 the bathroom 2 pee on the floor before leavin. but he was really hot and he left his jacket, should i call him?
all we need is a web designer
and a bunch of prostitutes
Fell asleep in bio again. Sometimes i feel like college is just one really expensive nap.
She is only going home with him in hopes to give him herpes. She has been plotting some master revenge since 7th grade.
I wonder if she thought to herself "I'm gonna sleep with that guy tonight" when she watched me puke on the bar at 3 in the afternoon?
she gave me a blowjob during our lunchbreak and expected me not to tell people
The bouncer yelled at him for poking at the guy selling roses, I think it's time to leave.
Drunk me spoon fed everyone baby food last night.
Got stiff armed by the garbage man on the back of the truck...I just wanted to ride one block dude
Just told myself the phrase "You're not THAT single" while dressing myself
You tried to order fondue take-out.
From Taco Bell.
When is the right time to ask your new roommate for her school schedule so she doesn't walk in on you fucking some rando in the kitchen in the middle of the afternoon?
The guy next to me on the bus has one hole in his jeans that has over 20 mini dicks drawn on his leg. Classic.
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