So just talked to them hahah i like that people sat there and watched as you two made out... They said they even had to refill their beers
how much land on farmville do you have now? i sold all my shit to make room i need more money... these animals need to know I'm running a business not a charity.
How can he have such a manly penis and baby hands?!
I think I slept in the cheesecake last night. Either that or I had a wet dream. Whatever happened I need to wash my pants.
Oh by the way, john gave me your shirt to return to you when I was at work today. I almost gave him his girlfriends underwear to return to her but figured it would be inappropriate.
I'm sorry I did drugs then got really loud and bitchy at your party and judged your choice in one night stands.
If I get there and all he has for my big valentines surprise is his body, I'm dumping his ass and posting his dirty pictures on a porn site so people can laugh at him.
I sleep texted my mom and asked her for a condom last night
They're frat boys at heart and have sickly, dusty, rotting souls.
The typical response to someone smacking their vodka soaked hand on your face is not to put your face in their crotch
Lesson learned. Don't roleplay with a real knife.
We broke up. And I told him he better give me my fucking star wars movies tomorrow. Priorities.
I have 13 missed calls from when I slept outside on some rocks
was that you i just saw walking down the street in only one heel smoking a cig yelling "hello sexuals" to everyone who passed??
HELLLLLO SEXUAL BEING
PSA Do not blow dry your junk.
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